FALLEN ••

I’m here looking at my phone wishing I could actually talk to you…the thoughts of you being hostile ,not replying me as I’ve rehearsed in my head keeps taunting me..*sigh
Well ,I wouldn’t say its your fault…guess its mine L. Always never had tym to give my heart out.. you came and you made me a prisoner ..i get flash backs to when we once ‘loved’ .. I remember being scared and you reassuring me you’ll not let me down if I don’t do same..i’d pictured a blissful moment with you.. i was aching at this time from a lost cause I had with a liar.
My head warned me but , why?my heart was too adamant …wish I had turned my heart down ..but I know me.. if I had done that I would wonder till today what you and I wud’ ve made…so bad ,its all broken glass pieces.. I would say I regret but ,I dunoo really what to think…

I wish I had answers to why you cut off your line from loving me back. .but it hurts.. seriously ,it does…cos I still do have my connection …to your heart…its ok.. I understand ‘people change’ they always do .. they come into ur life ,pretend they would stay with you tru the worse. .a little drizzle of rain tears and they off, ‘viola!’…outta ur life ….people do change.. but they do cos they came to take advantage ,when the advantage has been ripped off or is no more. .they disappear.. ‘thin’ into the air…

I’m not against you.. I still care but if u not doing this ,no point saying ‘I GUESS’.. I’ll leave and trust me..i know how to ,I do.. I’m still trying because I know I dint make up my mind to stop beating for you just yet. Thats y I still think of u and want u to be mine..imma set my mind to it.. all I need is for you to break my heart completely ,I need you to do that for us..cos “ its painful going apart but more painful holding on” …

317 words and I still think I ‘ve not said it all…
“SO MANY WORDS ALL WRITTEN IN SCRAPS ”.. maybe that’s y I can’t find my medium …
Feel sleepy … adios .xx